The world is full of Brain Surgeons!

I'm only writing this now as I have had a good few days to cool down from the absurdity of some people's logic. This promises to be my most scathing post yet. So hold on to your seats peoples this will be epic. Let's set the scene shall we? Miss R's parent's place is set on about 5 acres of land. Not a great deal in the scheme of things out in the country. They have a rudimentary fence around some rudimentary paddocks, but then they don't have any animals to fence in so why bother. They do however have one paddock that we worked out we could let the dogs loose in without fear of them escaping. Next to this paddock are the neighbours. These people have upwards of 200 acres and numerous paddocks at their disposal. Logic to these people dictate that they live in what amounts to a lean-to against an old caravan 50m from Miss R's parent's house which was there some 7 years before these brainless dickheads turned up. Anyway, these morons decided to choose to put 3 donkeys and 5 horses in the paddock next to the one where we have been letting the dogs off. Needlesss to say, neither Merlin nor Cleo had seen these animals before and barked their collective arses off towards these animals through the fence. I would like to re-iterate here that these dickheads have 200 acres to choose from. So they bark a bit, and the donkeys stand their ground and whatever. No-one's getting hurt, but we chose to take the dogs away anyway. Then Mr Moron pipes up over the fence saying how you can't trust dogs, they'll get through the fence and find a way to get through. Mrs Moron chimes in saying how great their donkeys are and they will make a mess of our dogs if they get through. Then Mr Moron takes it upon himself to throw a SHOVEL AT MY DOG. Well, that was it thank you Mr Shovel Chucker. He just laughed it off saying how the dogs should see him as the baddy now. Excuse me? I think you're a fucking moron myself. Then Mrs Moron pipes in again with this, and I quote: "What if those dogs spooked these horses while my kids are in the paddock with them??" OH MY GOD! The world is going to end!!! The sky is falling the sky is falling!!!!! Okay, let's use some simple mathematics to gauge how likely this event will occur: Fraction of time dogs outside: 1 hour in 24 which equals 0.042 Fraction of time your shitty kids are in the paddock with the horses: 10 minutes in 24 hours: 0.007 0.042 X 0.007 = 0.0003 or a 3 in 10,000 chance of such an event happening!! Holy shit!! If you read one of my previous posts about risk assessment you actually have more of a chance of dying from eating 3 tablespoons of peanut butter! Oh my God, wrap your kids in cotton wool and send them to the pillow farm love. This crazy woman then proceeded to lambaste us about our dogs and how dare we have them blah blah blah. Again, I would like to re-iterate that they have 200 ACRES TO CHOOSE FROM!!! Here is a point by point summary of how much WE have had to put with from these brain surgeons: 1: THEIR stupid dog standing on our porch barking its head off at 6am. Did we complain? NO. 2: Their sheep getting out and eating all the rose bushes. Did we complain? NO. 3: Their stupid horses reaching over the fence and continuing to eat more of the roses. Did we complain? No. 4: Mr fucking rocket scientist riding his quad bike past our bedroom window CONTINUOUSLY from 6am. Did we complain? No. 5: Their stupid fricken kids staring into our loungroom window at all hours of the day. Again, I would like to point out that they have 200 acres to play in, and yet they chose to play metres away from us. Did we complain? NO. And yet they had the audacity to bitch and moan to us about our dogs barking at their stupid freakin animals!! Oh the humanity! It's such a shame I can't order a tactical air strike on their stupid lean-to. The satisfaction I would get from seeing footage like those pin point air strikes in Iraq where the bomb goes down the chimney, would be simply staggering. If you know these people, please kick them in the head, you'll be doing a community service quite frankly.